During summer 2002, my parents decided that we would leave Kirkenes and we would move to Greece. My dad has an origin from some village of North Cefalonia. Cefalonia is an island, which is geographically located in Western Greece. We didn't need to buy a house, as there was already my dad's old family house there, which he had also lived for a few years into. We had travelled to Cefalonia earlier, but we wouldn't visit this place that often, so my memories are faint. Of course, the nature and landscape were beautiful and anyone would love to hike there.
On the other hand, the settlement there would be rather difficult, at least for me. To start with, I could understand only a few words in Greek, because I could just recall my father speaking a little bit. However, back in Norway, I was usually speaking Finnish, Norwegian and broken Russian, so I couldn't understand any single word in Greek. But I was soon starting school, hoping that my classmates would give me a hand. However, this was only my own illusion!
My house was located in Cefalonia's most northern part, although it wasn't as huge as the one in Kirkenes. You could have the view of the sea, if you were sitting at the backyard. There wasn't any house close to it, as you can see in that picture, and I can say that this was the only similarity of the place with Norway. There were no neighbours and nobody cared about what you were doing. This sweet privacy.
Apart from Monica and me, Johanna came along with us, because she was only 14 at the time. I never learnt the reason, why we moved to our island. My parents, though, were saying that they wanted to find their inner balance, but I was personally really annoyed by that. We, as children, were not even asked whether we actually wanted to leave the huge house in the prairie. Kirkenes was and will forever be my home and my heart was so broken, when I was forced to leave. I was in a place, where I didn't know anybody and I was feeling so alone.
I lived in Cefalonia for 6 years and the first one was a complete disaster for me. I started my education at the local village school and I wished to find new friends. Monica and I were not in the same group of pupils (Schools in Greece are divided into two or more groups, because the number of pupils is great), because it felt somehow uncomfortable to be classmates with your own sister). I wished though I had been at her group too, as children were very friendly there. Things at school didn't end up the way I had predicted that they would. When I went to school for the first time, no one from my classmates wanted me to sit next to them. Every single one of them, seeing me, were placing obviously their bag to the adjacent empty chair, in order to get me to understand that they did NOT want me to sit close to them. So, as it was natural, I went to sit alone in a desk at the back of the classroom. I could also see some children take a quick look at me and then laugh or whisper something in their friend's ear, while sneaking a peek. During school breaks, of course, nobody wanted to hang out with me. During the first month, at least, children didn't annoy me, but everybody would avoid me.
However, since October, I was a victim of harsh bullying. One day, the teacher noticed that I was constantly sitting alone at the back. So, she asked: "Ingrid, why do you never sit with anyone?" As I didn't know what to answer and the truth is that I didn't really want to anyway, I replied abruptly: "I feel fine". Very soon, I started listening to the comments, but also the names, which children had started to give me. They used to call me a gypsy, Viking, they used to say she has a homeless woman's hair, she looks like she's beaten up and being dragged to dirt, she stinks like she's not washed at all, she might stab you with a knife and any other nonsense their foolish head could think of.
I was feeling so upset and I couldn't do anything against all that. Nobody would bother me back in Kirkenes. Now I was obliged to face millions of problems and I didn't know the way. I couldn't even handle the situation all by myself, to tell them to stop and I couldn't even react. This wasn't part of my character. I was an extremely introvert person and I could never complain to anybody. However, I would never dare bursting into tears. I wouldn't give them the pleasure to see me surrender this way.
I was even scared to talk to my parents and teachers about anything that was happening. If I had done it, they might have avoided all that was happening, right from the start. Indeed, Monica had known what was happening at school, because anything that was told about me had reached her own ears. So, I took her and threatened her: "If I ever learn that you have spoken to anyone about all this, I will never ever talk to you!" However, poor Monica was even more introvert than me, so she never opened her mouth. And luckily, in her own class pupils were not that wicked, so they liked her indeed. But I was so scared and embarrassed that someone might learn something, because then I'd be the centre of attention. My classmates started attacking me even more harshly in November and this kind of attack was caused mainly because of their jealousy against me. They realised that this Ingrid is not only so shitty, but she also plays music. That is, she's far better than them and this can end up being dangerous to their own selfishness. During that time, I asked our music teacher to let me take part to the annual Christmas school fete, as I could play the harp, piano and accordion. Our teacher was really sweet and instantly agreed. However, my classmates didn't have the same opinion on that. When they realised, who was on the piano, they started giggling. But then again, they couldn't harm me in the presence of the teacher. However, as they saying goes, when the cat's away, the mice will play. When the teacher was absent, I was living a hell. They were swearing at me or saying very nasty things about my family and my hometown.
One day, the teacher was missing and they grabbed me, tied my hands and legs on a chair and everyone surrounded me, starting to throw things upon me, mainly sharp pencils. They even closed my mouth, so I couldn't scream and nobody would notice. I wasn't anyway a kid who would shout. I had learnt that you shan't fight fire with fire. You will let them do what they want with you. That's what I was taught. I was always listening people telling me that you can't fight fire with fire. You ought to be quiet, the good girl, in order to be likeable, and if you suffer, it's not that terrible. My eyes were even tied, so that I couldn't see what they were doing upon me. I didn't know what their intentions were and what else they were about to do, but at some point I felt a boy's hand pulling fiercely away my blouse.
To their own surprise, though, and fortunately for me, at that precise time the teacher entered the classroom and realised what was happening. "What's going on here?", she said strictly. Suddenly, everyone remained frozen waiting for the consequences and no single sound could be heard. I was really scared about this moment, because if the teacher punished the children, their hate against me would grow much bigger. However, the next thing she said was: "Untie her and go back to your seats". The next hour, instead of rehearsing, we had a great discussion. The teacher started by asking: "Why does everybody hate Ingrid so much?" Her question caused such a big trouble and noise in the classroom. Everyone started screaming nasty things against me like she's this, she's that and all of them were looking at me and hate and anger was drawn in their eyes. Or at least I thought that everybody did. Then, the teacher banged her hand in the desk. "Please, be quiet! You'll raise your finger and I'll let one of you talk. We are in a classroom, not on a playground". After that, no one dared even move, let alone dare to raise their finger.
"Well?", the teacher asked. "Am I waiting long?"
However, after what it seemed to be a long time, a boy raised his finger. I put my own hand before my mouth and I felt I wanted to burst into tears. I couldn't stand anyone accusing me in front of everybody or being exposed this way. But what followed was something I would never expect to happen. At least, I would never expect that a six-year-old and a half child would be so mature.
"Ingrid is a very shy and modest girl, that is much more charismatic and beautiful than everyone of us in here. Children feel jealous of her and of course they like to bully weak and quiet girls that have no strength to react. However, they cannot get at people who are as well powerful", he said.
All of us remained silent for a while. Then, the teacher said: "Is this true, guys? Was Nicholas right?"
Afterwards, an extensive discussion followed about weak children and bullying at school. On the one hand, this was fruitful for my classmates and made them realise that their behaviour was absolutely improper, on the other hand it made me feel rather uncomfortable. But then I heard about 30 times the phrase 'We're sorry about all this that we did' and other similar stuff. I just smiled and walked away. During the school break, I approached Nicholas and told him: "Thanks for standing by me. I feel grateful and if you ever need anything, do not hesitate to ask me".
Nicholas was a blonde guy and his parents were German. Since that day we became inseparable friends and very often we used to go at each other's homes. And our mothers became also very good friends. There was this non-Greek chemistry between us. Both Nicholas and I were shy and introverted, so our natures were similar. He was also inclined in music and sometimes we were having musical sessions, where I would play the piano and he would sing. Until the end of the first grade, he was my only friend. I wasn't mean to my classmates, however I hadn't completely forgiven them yet. I could feel how cruel children can be, so -as I was a child too-, I wanted to stay away for a while.
However, since the following year we created a rather close friendship which lasted until we were 12.
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